Your Safety Brain sees danger. SLAM goes the gateway between your Safety Brain and your Thinking Brain. The Safety Brain takes over... how do I get safe? Anger is our attack. If you get angry, irritated, annoyed, frustrated, right through to raging, you are in attack mode. That's what anger really is.
One of the big problems with the Safety Brain is when it first sees danger, it floods the body with adrenaline which triggers all kinds of neurological and chemical reactions within the body.
Once the Safety Brain takes over, it will be a minimum of 35 minutes and maybe all day before you can re access your Thinking Brain, truly calm down and get anything done.
Think about this: how long is the longest fight you've ever been in... hours... days... weeks?!
Have you ever had it happen where you had a bad day at work. Just a really bad day. You couldn't WAIT to get out of there! And you get in your car thinking "Yes. I'm OUTTA there!" But you can still feel some of the turmoil in your body. The chemicals are still there.
So, you start driving home and there are IDIOTS! on the road! RRRRRRGGGGGGG! People cutting you off. Morons who can't change lanes properly! Idiots driving too darned slow. With each one of these thoughts you are flooding your body with more and more adrenaline, more and more 'negative' neurological and chemical reactions.
You finally get home and you are NOT in a good mood. Who gets the brunt of your attack-your anger? Your spouse or partner? Your kids?
OR you start the morning and everything that could go wrong before you got out the door went wrong! You get in your car and there are STILL idiots on the road. GRRRRRRRRR! You finally get to work and get out of the car thinking "OK, I'm here. It's all good." (So far, you've had at least two hits of adrenaline, maybe more!)
You open the door to your office building and the very first person you see is THAT PERSON! GRRRRRRR! (Another hit of adrenaline and the negatives that go with it!)
"OK. OK. You're thinking to yourself. I'll just go to my desk and get to work." You get to your desk, sit down and find that people have dumped all kinds of work on your desk overnight! GRRRRRR! "OK. OK. I'll just go get a cup of coffee." And as you poured yourself some coffee some idiot comes along, knocks your elbow and you spill the coffee all over yourself! GRRRRRRR!
And this is what happens all day. Before you have the 35 minutes it takes to physically clear out your system, something else happens. It's like there's a crack in the dyke. Something else happens and your body FLOODS you with more adrenaline and negatives. It's obvious that there is HUGE danger out there today.
Have you ever gone through one of those days where you got to work in a bad mood and you just couldn't quite calm down. It was one thing after another after another. And by the end of the day you were exhausted and all you had really accomplished was busy work. You weren't able to actually settle in and concentrate on anything.
That's the Safety Brain and the need for that 35 minutes to clear your body and your brain. Instead, what happened all day was that you were hyper alert for danger - your body was at 100% ready to fight the sabre toothed tiger.
There are 10 Quickies For Calming Down Fast that you can get for free on my website. Check it out.
From now on, if you get to work in a bad mood, I want you to walk around the block TWICE before going into the office. I promise you, you and everyone around you will have a much better day!
Jeanette Kasper -- Your Anger UnTangler
When you truly understand that anger is an attack, triggered by only 5 possible fears, your ability control anger goes up.
Get Mrs. Kasper's first best seller 'Anger Is Not An Emotion" from http://angerisnotanemotion.com and pick up thousands of tips and strategies so you can easily deal with other angry, difficult people and total conquer your own anger.
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